A Big Mistake
by DarkChick51486
Summary: Ethan isn't what Justin thought he was. COMPLETE! please r&r.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I did not receive any profits for writing this. Please don't sue.  
  
  
It was a week after the rage party and Justin was just waking up. He still couldn't get used to the fact that he and Brian were no longer together. He shifted uncomfortably in Ethan's arms and removed himself from the bed. Justin walked quietly to the bathroom, tears welling up in his eyes just as they have been every morning since the party.  
He loved and missed Brian immensely; but he knew there was no turning back. He'd made his decision and now had to stand by it. Tears flowed like streams as he went through his memories. The first time they met, the time Brian stood up to Justin's father, the time Justin's father attacked Brian outside of Babylon.  
He stayed in the bathroom, crying, for a half-hour, then wiping his red eyes he opened the bathroom door. Justin jumped. Ethan was standing in the doorframe staring at him. "Jesus, Ethan, you scared the shit out of me." Justin nervously laughed, pushing past him and walking towards the kitchen.   
"You were crying again, weren't you?" Ethan asked, bitterly. "I told you before, I wasn't crying. I've just got a cold." Justin replied. "Don't lie to me. You were crying over that prick, Brian, again!" Ethan yelled.  
"Brian is not a prick!" Justin screamed. Ethan grabbed Justin roughly and punched him in the mouth, then threw him to the ground. "Don't ever raise you voice to me! Understand?" Ethan yelled. Justin just lay on the floor touching his lips and staring at Ethan in disbelief.  
Ethan glanced at Justin and sighed. He grabbed some paper towels and ran them under the sink, then walked to Justin and knelt down. "I'm sorry. I just don't like when people lie or yell at me. I'm really sorry. I swear it'll never happen again. I love you, Justin." Ethan spoke.  
Justin said nothing. He was still in the same state as when Ethan had hit him. Ethan lightly touched Justin's hand and softly asked, "Let me see?" Still, there was no response from Justin. Ethan pulled Justin's hand away from his mouth and saw that his bottom lip was bloody. He delicately wiped the blood off, then stood back up.  
"I'm sorry, Justin. But, you know this really wasn't my fault. You shouldn't have yelled at me." Ethan spoke, once again, glancing at Justin whom still remained motionless.  
"Ugh! Fine, if you're just going to sit there like a zombie, I'm leaving. I'll be back in a few hours with lunch. Maybe by then you'll stop crying over the prick!" Ethan spoke, exasperatedly. He slammed the door as he left.  
"Brian's not a prick." Justin spoke to the empty room. Then he lay on the floor in a fetal position, thinking of what had just happened. 


	2. chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing. I did not receive anything for writing this. Please don't sue.  
  
  
Brian groaned as an incessant ringing awoke him. With eyes still shut, he groped his hand around for the source, knocking his clock over in the process. Finally reaching his cell phone, he angrily answered, "What?"  
"Hey. I was just calling to ask if you wanted a ride to Babylon tonight." Michael spoke. "I can drive myself! Now, leave me alone." Brian snapped and hung up. His hangovers seemed to be getting worse by the day. He could barely remember driving home the night before, let alone how many drinks he'd had.   
Since that fateful night at Babylon where Justin had left with Ethan, he seemed to change. He was doing more drugs, drinking more, and had stopped tricking around.  
Justin's leaving was a rude awakening for him. He realized that he should have told Justin about his feelings. But now it was too late. Justin had made his choice and Brian wasn't going to go chasing after him. Brian had tried to hide his feeling for too long and now he would never be able to tell him. He'd lost his chance.  
Hopefully just seeing him around would appease his agony for a little while. He hadn't even seen Justin since that night and it was killing him. Just because his Sunshine gave up on him didn't mean he had to give up Liberty Avenue, too. Brian threw the sheets over his head and drifted back to sleep. 


	3. chapter3

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I did not receive money for writing this. I just love the show. Please don't sue.  
  
  
As Justin heard the doorknob turn, he hurriedly threw the notebook he was writing in into his school bag. Ethan walked in holding a pizza box. "Hey." Ethan spoke softly. "Hey." Justin replied, feigning a smile. Ethan smiled back. "I see you're off the floor, at least." Ethan commented. "Yeah." Justin quietly responded. His gaze flickered to the floor, but he forced himself to look at Ethan. 'Pretend you're fine. Just pretend everything is fine' Justin repeated in his head. Truth be told he was terrified. If one little argument could turn into abuse, what would happen if it were slightly bigger? And even though Ethan said it would never happen again, how could he really be sure? He barely knew Ethan, really.   
"I didn't mean for that to happen earlier..." Ethan spoke gently. "It doesn't matter. It was an accident, right? Let's just not talk about it." Justin spoke back. "Well, I got lunch." Ethan said, setting the pizza box on the table. "Great." Justin replied, opening the box and taking a slice. The whole situation made him sick. This man hit him only a few hours ago and here he was pretending everything was fine and having to eat when really he wanted to vomit.   
The pizza tasted like dirt. He was so nauseated by the situation that even his taste buds weren't functioning right. Even through the revolting taste, Justin had managed to eat every bite of his slice. "I'm going to take a shower." Justin informed Ethan. Ethan just nodded as he watched the blond walk towards the bathroom. Once inside, Justin turned on the water and ran to the toilet. Kneeling in front of it, he threw up his lunch. He cried silent tears, as everything in his body seemed to be coming up his esophagus.   
When it seemed like nothing more would come out he laid his back against the filthy floor. Slowly, he stood and stripped off his clothes. The tears were still pouring down his face when he got into the shower and crouched on the floor of it. His arms cradled his knees as he watched the water rush into the drain.   
After an hour had went by, he shut off the shower and redressed. Leaving the room, he walked to the bed and lay down. Ethan walked over and lay down next to him. Knowing what had to be done, Justin threw his arms around Ethan and rested his head on his chest. Shutting his eyes tight, he wished sleep upon himself. 


	4. chapter4

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I did not receive anything for this.  
  
  
  
Justin awoke to loud screaming. "What the fuck is this? Justin answer me!" Ethan screamed. "Justin rubbed his eyes and glanced over to see Ethan holding the notebook he had been scribbling in the previous day. His face went pale and he opened his mouth to speak but couldn't form the words. "I said, what the fuck is this? 'I think I made a mistake. I shouldn't have left with Ethan. Brian was the one I wanted. I still want him. I don't really even feel love for Ethan.' You fucking prick, speak. How dare you write this shit!" Ethan screamed.   
"I'm sorry. It's not what it looks like." Justin tried. "Not what it looks like? Could it be any more obvious?" Ethan raged. "Ethan, please, just let me explain." Justin spoke, walking in front of him. "Fuck your explaining!" Ethan yelled as he slammed his fist into Justin's face. He flung him against the wall and began furiously hitting him. "Stop! Please stop! I'm sorry. Please. Let me go." Justin begged. "Damn it!" Ethan shouted, backing away. Justin lie against a corner, shuttering. Bruises covered his face and blood ran from his nose.   
"Why do you keep doing this, Justin? Why can't you just deal with the fact that I love you instead of trying to make me hurt you? Do you like me hurting you? I don't. I love you, Justin. Why can't you just deal with it and stop wishing for that asshole? He can never love you like I can. Hell, he can't even say the fucking words!" Ethan spoke. "I-I know. I love you, Ethan, not him. I'm sorry. I love you. I love you." Justin returned. Ethan frowned and sat on the floor next to Justin. He reached his arms out and Justin jerked away. Ethan scooted closer and wrapped his arms around Justin.  
Standing up, Ethan commanded, "Don't go anywhere. I'll be back in a little while. Try to clean yourself up or something." He walked out and Justin was left alone. He didn't want to move but was afraid not to obey Ethan's command to clean up. He staggered towards the bathroom and washed the blood from his face. His muscles ached and his face was black and blue. Justin stared at his eyes. His once beautiful eyes sparkling with youth and happiness now reflected nothing but sadness, terror, and loneliness.  
Justin tore his gaze from the mirror as he heard the door open. Ethan appeared and tossed a plastic bag at him. "I figured you might want to use this." Ethan explained. Justin opened the bag to find a compact of foundation. "Thanks." He hoarsely replied. Ethan left the room as Justin began to put on the make-up. 


	5. chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters. I didn't receive anything for writing this.  
  
  
Brian stood by the bar in Babylon. He had already consumed three beers and was now on his fourth shot of Jack Daniels. "Whoa, don't you think you should slow it down a bit?" Michael asked. "No." Brian replied. He then scanned the crowd hoping against hope that he would see Justin's blond hair. He didn't.   
"I'm out of here." Brian spoke. "Well, hey, maybe I should give you a ride." Michael responded. "No thanks." Brian called back as he walked to the exit. 'I don't know why I even bother coming out. He's never here. He'll never be here again. Great going, Kinney. This is the biggest you ever fucked up.' Brian thought to himself as he got into his jeep and drove off into the night. 


	6. chap6

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters. Only the plot is mine.  
  
  
As Justin stared out the window in the dingy apartment, Ethan practiced "Cantabile" by Niccolo Paganini. Justin's mind began to wander. 'How could I have done this? How could I have left Brian for...this! This disgusting apartment. This guy that says he loves me but then hits me. Sure Brian couldn't say the words to me but at least he didn't hit me. I don't want to be here. I don't belong here. I belong with-'   
Justin's thoughts stopped abruptly as he was slammed face first into the wall in front of him. He collapsed onto the floor to see a furious Ethan standing above him. Justin couldn't speak. He only stared, awaiting the events that were sure to occur. "You can't even go five minutes without thinking about him, can you?" Ethan yelled. "I-" Justin tried to speak, but Ethan kicked his leg violently. Tears welled in Justin's eyes from the pain.   
Ethan tightly grabbed Justin's arm and yanked him off the ground. He dug his nails into Justin's skin and watched with an amused expression on his face as Justin fought not to scream at the intense pain. "Please, Ethan." Justin whispered, hoping Ethan would stop. He didn't. He threw him against the wall again and just kept throwing punches.  
Finally, after more than ten blows, Justin fell to the floor unconscious. Ethan looked at him and walked away. He picked up his violin and resumed playing. 


	7. chap 7

Disclaimer: All I own is the plot.  
  
  
Justin awoke at seven the next night to find himself alone. He was still on the floor, covered in dry blood and bruises. He slowly rose from the floor wincing from the pain. He walked to the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. He cleaned the blood off and put on the cover-up Ethan had recently given him. He stripped off his clothes and changed into clean ones. As he did so he noticed various bruises on his chest and the fingernail marks that Ethan had made on his arm.   
Justin again looked into the mirror. He almost looked like his old self except for his eyes lacking happiness. He walked out of the bathroom, grabbed his wallet and keys and walked out of the apartment. He then began his trek to Liberty Avenue. 


	8. chap 8

Disclaimer: All I own is the plot.  
  
  
Brian began his nightly ritual of Justin searching in Babylon. The hope of him actually showing up was all Brian had to cling to in life. He caught sight of Michael on the dance floor and walked over and started dancing with him. As much as Brian tried to pretend that he was all right, Michael knew the truth. Brian really did love Justin and now was heartbroken.  
Brian was able to focus his mind on the dancing for an hour before he couldn't help but look around for Justin again. Brian stopped dancing. "Brian? What's wrong?" Michael asked, then followed his gaze. Justin was standing at the bar guzzling a beer. Brian watched as he put down the bottle and received another once again drinking it quickly. Brian slowly walked through the crowd towards the bar.   
Justin had just been handed his third beer when Brian reached the bar. "Have you become an alcoholic since I last saw you?" Brian asked. Startled, Justin clasped his hand over his mouth to keep from spitting the beer out. "I'm just having a few drinks. That doesn't make me a drunk." Justin replied, after he had swallowed the beer. "Why haven't you been around?" Brian inquired. "I haven't felt like it. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go dance." Justin spoke.   
Brian lightly grabbed Justin's arm as he began to walk away. Justin cringed and let out a cry of pain. "Let me go." Justin quietly spoke. Brian dropped his arm and stared at stared at him in confusion. Something was wrong. Justin's eyes no longer looked happy. Now they looked empty. "What? Why are you staring at me like that?" Justin asked, a tinge of fear in his voice. Something else about Justin caught his eye.   
Brian raised his hand to Justin's face and wiped it across his cheek. Justin pushed Brian away and ran out the exit. He looked at his hand. It was covered in powder. He felt fear in his stomach. He quickly ran out of Babylon and hailed a cab, following Justin. Justin ran all the way back to the apartment never noticing Brian was following. When Justin had ran into the apartment building, Brian got out of the cab and watched for a sign as to which floor he lived on.  
Sure enough on the third floor a light flashed on. Brian walked into the building and slowly up the flights of stairs. All the while panic was building in the pit of his stomach. He knew what was going on but he didn't want to believe it. He didn't want to believe that his Sunshine would be stupid enough to let some guy abuse him. 'But he stayed with me all that time and I was no better.' Brian thought to himself as he reached the third floor. 


	9. chap 9

Disclaimer: All I own is the plot.  
  
  
"Where were you?" Ethan asked. His eyes were filled with anger. "I-I was down Liberty Avenue." Justin stammered. "Why?" Ethan questioned, walking towards him. "I-I felt like dancing." Justin replied. "With Brian?" Ethan then asked. "No." Justin answered. "Liar!" Ethan yelled, punching Justin in the stomach. He doubled over in pain. "You little shit! You're nothing but a whore you know that?" Ethan shouted, hitting Justin's nose.   
" Please stop, Ethan. The neighbors will hear. Please stop it." Justin cried. Ethan only ignored his pleas. As Ethan thrust him into a wall, Justin closed his eyes in pain and again cried out, "Ethan, please stop!"  
"I'll fucking kill you!" A voice sounded throughout the room. Ethan was roughly pulled off of Justin and pinned to the floor. Justin opened his eyes to see Brian punching Ethan in the stomach repeatedly. "Stop it! Brian, stop! You're hurting him!" Justin screamed, trying to pull Brian off of Ethan. "I know that!" Brian yelled, never stopping his assault.   
"Brian, if you don't leave I'm calling the cops!" Justin screamed. Brian punched Ethan a final time and stood up never taking his eyes off of Justin. "Just leave, Brian. Go, okay. Please." Justin spoke barely above a whisper. "Fine, I'll go. But you're coming with me." Brian said, as he latched onto Justin's shoulders and started pushing him towards the door.  
"Brian, I can't. Stop. Let go of me. You're only going to make things worse." Justin spoke, but let Brian pull him towards the door without a struggle. "He doesn't want to go with you, Kinney. If you take him, I'll call the police." Ethan spoke, still lying on the floor. "And say what? You beat him so hard he's afraid to leave you. If I were you, I'd forget all about Justin and stay the hell away from him because if I ever see you so much as look at him I'll fucking kill you." Brian growled, then walked Justin out of the apartment. 


	10. chap 10

Disclaimer: All I own is the plot.  
  
  
"Take off your clothes, Justin. I need to see how bad it is." Brian spoke, once inside the loft. "Please, don't make me. It's not bad, I swear." Justin quietly spoke. "Please, Justin. Let me see." Brian sighed. Tears welled up in Justin's eyes as he took off his shirt and pants.   
"Christ! How many times has he done this to you?" Brian shouted, as he took in the sight of Justin's battered body. "It's not as bad as it looks. I just kept doing things that caused him to get mad. It was my fault, Brian." Justin spoke, almost inaudibly. "What could you have possibly done to deserve this? He's an abuser. They use any excuse they can think of to justify what they are doing, Justin. How can you look at yourself and then stand here and defend him?!" Brian screamed.  
"I defended you all the time, didn't I? There not much difference between him and you. The only difference is that the things he's done to me you can see and the scars you left me are on the inside." Justin spoke as he stared into Brian's eyes. "I deserve that. And you're right. I did hurt you a lot and I'm sorry. I fucked up. I pushed you away because I was afraid that eventually you'd see that you're better off with someone else. I thought that if I pushed you away that I wouldn't fall in love with you, so when you came to your senses and left me it wouldn't hurt. But I was wrong. It didn't work out that way. When I saw you leave with Ethan, it felt like a part of my soul was being ripped away. God if I had only said the words this wouldn't have happened!" Brian spoke, staring at the floor.  
"It wasn't your fault, Brian. None of this was your fault. I shouldn't have left. I just should've stayed. I was wrong about words being important. They're not." Justin spoke, as he threw his arms around Brian. "Don't ever leave me again." Brian whispered hoarsely into Justin's ear. "Never." Justin cried. "Justin?" Brian asked. "Yeah." Justin replied. "I love you." Brian whispered. "I love you, too, Brian." 


End file.
